Consideration

I think one of the most overlooked qualities in a relationship is consideration.

People talk about love. They talk about trust.

They talk about communication. But consideration is rarely mentioned, even though it's woven into all three.

So what is consideration?

To me, consideration is taking your partner's feelings, needs, limitations, and circumstances into account before making a decision or taking an action.

It's asking yourself:

"How will this affect the person I love?"

And sometimes, the smallest acts of consideration can make the biggest difference.

It's keeping the house quiet when your partner is sleeping because you know they had a long day. It's understanding that their need for rest is just as important as your desire to be awake.

It's discussing major purchases before spending large amounts of money.

Not because you need permission, but because you're a team. Your decisions affect each other.

It's not pressuring your partner to do things they're unable to do—whether physically, emotionally, financially, or mentally.

It's respecting their limitations without making them feel guilty for having them.

It's avoiding topics you know will upset them unnecessarily. 

It's paying attention when they tell you something hurts them. It's remembering what they've shared and using that information to care for them better.

Consideration says:

"I hear you."

"I see you."

"You matter to me."

The opposite of consideration isn't necessarily cruelty. 

Sometimes it's simply thoughtlessness. Sometimes people become so focused on their own wants, needs, and interests that they forget to consider how their actions affect the person standing beside them.

And that's where problems begin.

Because when someone repeatedly feels unconsidered, they begin to feel unimportant.

They begin to feel unheard. They begin to feel like their comfort, opinions, and feelings rank lower on the priority list. 

Over time, resentment starts to grow. Not because of one major event. But because of hundreds of small moments.

The loud television while they're trying to sleep. The purchase they weren't consulted about. The interrupted conversations. The repeated disregard for something they've clearly expressed.

Each moment may seem insignificant by itself. But together, they send a message.

And that message is:

"What matters to you doesn't matter as much to me."

That's a painful message to receive from someone you love.

The truth is, consideration isn't difficult.

It doesn't cost money. It doesn't require special skills.

It simply requires awareness. It requires slowing down long enough to think about another person's experience.

And honestly, I think that's one of the purest expressions of love.

Not flowers.

Not gifts.

Not fancy dates.

Just consistently showing your partner that their feelings matter.

Because when two people actively consider one another, they create something beautiful:

A relationship where both people feel valued.

A relationship where both people feel respected. A relationship where both people feel loved.

And at the end of the day, isn't that what we're all looking for? 

Until We Speak Again, 

A Thoughtful Soul

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Leave a comment below. What are your thoughts on consideration? Do you feel like it's important?  Let's talk!