It's Okay to Choose Yourself Sometimes

It's Okay to Choose Yourself Sometimes

Are you the person who always puts everyone else first?

The one who makes sure everyone is okay before checking on yourself?

The one who says yes when you really want to say no?

The one who takes care of everyone else's needs while quietly putting your own on the back burner?

If you are, I want you to hear something:

It's okay to choose yourself sometimes.

Taking care of yourself doesn't make you

 selfish. 

It doesn't mean you don't love your family.

It doesn't mean you don't care about your partner, your children, your friends, or the people who depend on you.

It means you're human. And humans need care too.

We spend so much time making sure everyone else is happy that sometimes we forget to ask ourselves a simple question:

"What would make me happy?"

Maybe it's getting your hair or nails done.

Maybe it's trying a new hobby.

Maybe it's going to your favorite restaurant and ordering exactly what you want.

Maybe it's starting that little house project you've been thinking about.

Maybe it's taking the scenic route home just because you want to enjoy the view.

Maybe it's sitting somewhere quiet with a cup of coffee and doing absolutely nothing.

It doesn't have to be expensive. 

Sometimes self-care can be five minutes. Ten minutes. An hour. Or maybe, if you're fortunate enough to have the time, an entire day.

The amount of time isn't what matters.

Taking the time matters.

And sometimes self-care means saying no.

No, I don't want to go.

No, I don't have the energy today.

No, I can't take that on right now.

No, I need some time for myself.

And you don't always have to feel guilty for it.

You are allowed to have limits.

You are allowed to rest.

You are allowed to protect your peace.

You are allowed to do something simply because it brings you joy.

Mental health matters.

Your emotional well-being matters.

And constantly ignoring your own needs doesn't make you a better person. Sometimes it just leaves you exhausted, resentful, overwhelmed, and emotionally drained.

How can you constantly make everyone else happy when you're miserable inside?

How can you keep pouring into everyone else when your own cup is empty?

You can't always give from an empty place. That's why taking care of yourself isn't selfish.

It's maintenance.

Just like a car needs fuel to keep running, we need time to recharge too.

And sometimes we need more than a few minutes.

Sometimes we need to step away from everything.

Put the phone down.

Stop answering messages.

Stop solving everyone else's problems.

Stop worrying about what everyone needs from you.

And simply breathe.

Give yourself permission to exist without having to accomplish something.

You don't have to earn rest.

You don't have to earn happiness.

You don't have to wait until everyone else is okay before you're allowed to be okay.

And here's something else I've learned:

You shouldn't have to completely lose yourself trying to make other people happy.

The people who love you should want you to be happy too.

They should want you to have hobbies.

They should want you to have friends.

They should want you to have quiet time.

They should want you to laugh.

They should want you to have something that's just yours.

Because your happiness shouldn't be a threat to the people around you. It should be something they celebrate with you.

So if you've been putting yourself last for a long time, maybe it's time to move yourself a little closer to the front of the line. Not because everyone else suddenly matters less.

But because you matter too.

Take the drive.

Try the hobby.

Order the dessert.

Get your hair done.

Start the project.

Sit quietly with your coffee.

Say no when you need to.

Say yes to something that makes you happy.

Take five minutes. Take an hour. Take a day.

Whatever you need.

Because taking care of yourself isn't selfish.

Sometimes it's the most loving thing you can do—not only for yourself, but for the people you love.

A happier, healthier you has more of yourself to give. And maybe that's the real point of self-care.

It's not about putting yourself above everyone else. It's about remembering that you belong on your own list, too.

Until We Speak Again,

A Nurturing Soul

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Leave a comment with your thoughts. What's your self-care routine? What are your little joys of life? Let's talk!